A Call to Genuine Love

 

Romans 12:9-10, " Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. ¹⁰ Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other (NLT)

Biblical Christianity has a vertical as well as a horizontal dimension.  When you truly understand the message of the gospel it is going to affect how you relate to God (vertical) and how we relate to each other (horizontal).

In the first eleven chapters of Romans, Paul explains the gospel.  When we get to chapter 12 he tells us how this should change us.  In the first several verses of Romans 12 Paul address the vertical dimension of faith.  When we understand the message of salvation, we will respond to God by giving ourselves as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God which is our spiritual form of worship.  We will also seek to serve Him in the area where He has called us to serve.

In verse nine and following Paul begins to describe the horizontal dimensions of faith.  He lays out the principle in verse 9: Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. The verses that follow amplify on the principle and offers profound spiritual guidance. This verse is part of Paul’s letter to the Romans, where he outlines how believers should live out their faith in daily life. In just a few words, Paul conveys three critical principles: authenticity, moral discernment, and devotion to goodness.

 First, Paul emphasizes the need for love to be genuine;” Do not pretend to love others. Really love them”.  He starts by telling us to not just pretend to love others but really love them. In other words, love must be sincere. In the original language, Greek word sincere actually means, “without hypocrisy”  Most of us like to think that we’re generally pretty loving people. Love, in its truest form, is not performative or self-serving. It must come from an honest place in the heart, rooted in compassion and empathy.

Let me ask you some questions though. Do you ever politely listen to someone, while inwardly rolling your eyes at them? Do you ever smile at someone, but the second they’re gone, your face reveals how you really feel about them? Do you ever speak negatively about people behind their backs? Do you ever see someone walking toward you, and you take a deep breath because you’re dreading speaking to them?

We don’t like to admit it, but most of us do these things sometimes. And each of these things is merely pretending to love another person. Most of us are very good at playing this game. Hypocritical love harms both the giver and receiver. Genuine love doesn’t require pretending or imagining interest. By calling for authenticity, Paul reminds us that God sees beyond outward actions into the motivations behind them.

The second directive, to "hate what is wrong," encourages believers to develop a moral compass aligned with God’s truth. This phrase suggests more than a passive avoidance of wrongdoing—it calls for an active rejection of sin. Genuine love wants what is best for a person. Evil is never what’s best. It is always harmful. It is not loving for us to sit idly by and watch someone do something that is harmful to themselves. Detesting evil means being vigilant against actions, attitudes, and habits that hurt others or lead us away from righteousness. Evil things hold us back from being who God wants us to be, and if we hate what is evil, we’ll be willing to take steps, even radical ones, to weed those things out of our lives. Our focus should be to seek what is good and escape what is evil. It is an invitation to cultivate a sensitivity to what dishonors God’s love.

Finally, Paul instructs us to “Hold tightly to what is good.” The imagery suggests a strong, almost desperate attachment. Just as sailors cling to a lifeline in stormy seas, Christians are to hold fast to goodness. Clinging to what is good means seeking virtues like kindness, honesty, and humility. It also implies surrounding ourselves with people and environments that promote spiritual growth.

Romans 12:9 serves as a timeless reminder of how to live a life marked by integrity, moral discernment, and unshakable goodness.

Through its simple but powerful instructions, it calls us to love authentically and live righteously. Paul’s point is that genuine love doesn’t just happen, it’s something we need to work on developing. But when we do, it bears wonderful fruit. He is challenging us to look at people differently. He says we should delight in finding the treasure in others. We should focus on seeing the blessings of others, rather than their failures. When we do that, showing affection isn’t difficult, and it isn’t a show. It comes naturally.

Discussion Questions:

1. How can we practice genuine love in everyday relationships without falling into the trap of hypocrisy or insincerity? 

2. What are some practical ways to "abhor what is evil" and "cling to what is good" in the face of daily temptations and challenges?